Midday Musings
- Tyler Ulmer
- Apr 10
- 2 min read
Updated: Apr 10
Powered by Shadow-Soft
(Because Even Your Golf Picks Need Infrastructure Support)
Hello again, friends.
Jim Nantz here, live from the whisper-quiet corner of Amen Corner, where I’m enjoying a slightly-too-warm Arnold Palmer and watching the dreams of pool participants slowly unravel—one bogey at a time.
This midday update is brought to you by our friends at Shadow-Soft, the only IT solutions company that understands your software stack and your irrational belief that Fred Couples still has one last magical run in him. Whether you need Kubernetes consulting or just a safe space to scream about your 10th pick going +6 through four holes, Shadow-Soft has you covered.™
Live From Disgusta Pool Leaderboard Update:
Mike Gatlin is currently sitting on a lush little throne atop our leaderboard at -19, which is suspiciously impressive. We’ve notified the USGA to inspect his Google Sheet for illegal drop zones and possible sandbagging.
Just behind him is a tight pack of contenders who are either about to pounce or about to completely unravel like a Sunday back nine at Augusta.
One thing’s for sure: it’s still anyone’s game. Unless your name is Indigo.
Caddie’s Catastrophe:
Our beloved four-legged friend Indigo—aka “Caddie”—is currently dead last. Yes, last. It seems her instincts for sniffing out birdies do not translate to spreadsheet success.
She’s received multiple penalty strokes for refusing to “play it as it lies” and instead retrieving her own ball and proudly dropping it on the green. Integrity? Impeccable. Rule-following? Not so much.
When asked for comment, she just stared at me, yawned, and plopped back down on the sofa. It’s hard to stay mad.
🏌️♂️ Out in the world of actual golf:
Justin Rose leads the pack at 7-under, clinging to a three-shot lead and to the last few remnants of his hairline.
Corey Conners, Scottie Scheffler, Tyrrell Hatton, Rory McIlroy, and Tyrell Hatton are all lurking dangerously close behind.
And then there's Nick Dunlap, who might currently be rethinking every life choice that led to an 18-over 90. He found enough water to put out the Table Rock wildfire four times over and is now listed on Google Maps as an Amen Corner tour guide.
⚠️ Gentle Gambling Reminder:
Payment is still due from the following spiritual freeloaders:
I’m not saying your picks will start mysteriously dropping strokes if you don’t pay, but I am saying I once saw Indigo bite a man for less.
We’ll check back in this evening with our friend Big John Daly, tragic overreactions, and an official ruling on whether Mr. Dunlap can play wearing scuba gear – which would still be less off-putting than anything Malbon has to offer.
Until then, may your cut lines be generous, your refreshes rewarding, and your boss not catch you watching ESPN+ in your “meeting.”
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