Moving Day In Augusta

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Hello again, friends.

Jim Nantz here, broadcasting from a rocking chair on the edge of Magnolia Lane, where the breeze is light, the tension is thick, and someone just asked if “that guy with the arms” is still in pursuit. (Yes, he is. But more on Bryson in a moment.)

It’s Saturday – Moving Day – in Augusta. The cut line fell at +2 yesterday, and just like that tragic bunker shot you thought no one saw—things are getting very real.

My apologies for not checking in yesterday evening – rain delays forced our foursome into the clubhouse at Mountain Park where the Transfusions were flowing like Cam Smith’s mullet, and… well, you can surmise how the remainder of the day unfolded. Let’s just say David Porter was embodying the John Daly lifestyle and dragging us along with him.

🎯 Masters Leaderboard Highlights:

• Justin Rose remains your leader at -8, looking like a man who irons his polos with the same precision he uses to stripe a 7-iron.

• Bryson DeChambeau, one stroke back at -7, continues his monster surge—but you wouldn’t know it if you were watching the broadcast. The network has offered more screen time to the Augusta squirrels than to the man bombing his way into contention.

• Rory McIlroy is now just 2 shots back, coiled like a spring and eerily calm—possibly due to an emotional cleanse or a heavy breakfast.

🎟️ Live from Disgusta Pool Leaderboard:Ladies and gentlemen, we have a shake-up:Hayley Ulmer and Corey Sanders have surged into a shared lead, proving once again that intuition, patience, and possibly blind luck are the backbone of greatness.

Trailing them like patrons in a concession line are:

• Kyle Strowe

• Reid Morelli

• James Chinn

• Mike Gatlin

They’re close. But not Hayley-and-Corey close.

💧 Nick Dunlap: Back From the Depths

A 71 today. Yes, that Nick Dunlap. He rebounded like a man who stared into Rae’s Creek and saw his own reflection whispering, “Not like this.”Now? He’s earned back some praise, and at least one subtle nod from Scottie. It wasn’t enough to make the cut, but he earned the respect of the field and the world with his focused turnaround.

🐶 Indigo Watch:

Missed the cut. Still adorable. She’s added “barking at the wind” to her post-shot routine and is now blaming her caddie (me) for poor course management. No regrets.

🔁 Juicy Watch:

Juicy John Stephens entered five teams. He managed to get one into the top 25 with a late surge Friday. Statistically, this is harder to do than winning the pool. It’s performance art at this point.

Also sneaking into the top 25 is team “Cam & Morgan Fuller.” You won’t be surprised to hear these two also share an Instagram account for their cats.

We’ll check back after my own round this afternoon, where I’ll likely lose two sleeves of balls to the majestic mystique of Glassy Mountain. In the meantime, hydrate, scroll, and pray for screen time for Bryson.

This is Disgusta. We tell the stories the mainstream can’t handle.